The Main Hallway

Welcome to the Main Hall. Come in, sit down, warm yourself by the fire. I'm sure you won't be leaving for quite a while. There is a cold drizzle just began outside, and I doubt you want to be caught in the rain. Besides, the wolverines have probably picked up your scent by now. If you go beyond my castle walls, they'll probably rip you to shreds. I don't get many visitors this far from civilization. I must say, this is quite a pleasant surprise. Let me tell you a little about myself, and my Laboratory. Within these walls I conduct experiments, very special ones. No, I don't clone sheep. I don't gaze towards the skies, as a dreamer does, desiring to prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that there is life on other planets. (*Sigh* I did THAT in 2nd grade. Don't believe me? Look what's in my hangar out back.) I don't cure viruses, nor create them, a hobby some of my "esteemed" colleagues seem to have taken up as of late. And it is on a very rare occaision that you will find me gazing into a microscope, observing micro-organisms reproduce themselves. As I said earlier, this is a VERY special laboratory. Within this castle, I create ENTIRE UNIVERSES, and the characters that interact within them. How, you say? Why, with my VAST intellect, of course. Then again, you probably should've known that by now. Still don't understand? I've said enough. Perhaps it's time to show you how. This is, after all, YOUR intrusion. You'd best make the most of your last day on this Earth. You've complete access to my estate, and it's many rooms. You'll have to pardon the mess, however. I've been rennovating the castle recently, and a few of the rooms may be inaccessible. Others still may be operative, but still incomplete. And others still may appear completely functional, but perhaps later I shall see it fit to improve upon them yet again. I should be finished soon, though. Stop by often and see. Nevertheless, choose a room, and explore. There aren't many rules. Just don't feed my Gunther. He can get pretty rily after two fish-head dinners a day. What's that? What's a Gunther? Oh, well, you'll see . . . . .